Save Money On Lawyers. Make-Your-Own Living Will.

The Terri Schiavo debacle (remember her?) brought to light the importance of having your wishes written down, so no one (family, friends OR the government) has to resort to guesswork to purport to knowing what YOUR last wishes ultimately WERE. In keeping with this reporter's long history of serving the public interest, I now present to you, Gentle Readers, the Do-It-Yourself Living Will Kit! Just clip, fill out, and attatch to the refrigerator with a cute little magnet--cause if you file it, no one will find it till it's too late. Enjoy!


I, __________________________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it or lawyers/doctors interested in simply running up the bills. If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:
______A Bloody Mary
______A Cold Beer
______A Rum and Coke
______A Martini
______A Vodka on the rocks
______A Steak
______Lobster or crab legs
______My Golf clubs
______The remote control
______A Bowl of ice cream
______The sports page
______Chocolate
______Sex

It should be presumed that I won't ever get better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.

Signature: ___________________________
Date: ___________________________


In all seriousness, a living will IS something to think about. Here's a link to a REAL living will, and more info:
http://www.hcdecisions.org/hcd_forms.pdf