Tragedy, In Degrees.

Something to think about, from Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert. He's not all laughs, it seems....

Tragedy Ranking System

Every time there’s a military conflict, someone points out that many of the victims were NOT adult men. The theory is that a tragedy is way more tragic if anyone other than adult men get killed. If you throw a woman or a minor or a puppy into the mix then we all have a reason to be sadder and madder.

I totally agree with the view that some tragedies are more tragic than others, depending on who is involved. But I do demand efficiency. That’s why I propose ranking the value of all types of people so I can more easily judge how sad I should feel when they get killed.

For example, if 400 villagers are buried in a mudslide, I’d like to know how many of them were drunks, assholes, nags, dickheads, crooks, or males, just to pick a few examples. I wouldn’t feel as much pressure to feel bad about that portion of the village. In the best case scenario, the victims would all be adult men with no special talents. That’s barely even a tragedy. We adult males have our uses to be sure, but society agrees that it’s not such a big deal when someone kills us.

I think that the main reason there are so many wars is that most of the soldiers are adult males. If all wars had to be fought exclusively by second graders or contestants from the Special Olympics, no one would ever start a war because the results would be too tragic.

Hmmmmm.....you know, all kidding and sarcasm aside, he has a point......

Stop The Presses. (Or, Rewriting History.)

TODAY IN HISTORY: On this date in 1957, the Space Age, and the Space Race begins as Russia launches Sputnik I, the first Earth-orbiting satellite.
Coincidentally, today is also the 82nd birthday of Charlton Heston; who played Fort Wayne's own astronaut 'Taylor' in Planet Of The Apes.

It's no secret, if you know me, that I love the space program; and am still a big fan of NASA. Despite their problems, their flaws, and the occasional (and sometimes tragic) public failure, they still have an impressive track record. Think of how complex a shuttle launch and landing are, and you'll begin to understand that the loss of two shuttles and Apollo 1, while sad in the cost of human life, is damned impressive from a scientific standpoint. Consider Edison's ten thousand failures--er, tries-- before he got the light bulb right. And as someone who has been fortunate enough to meet and get to know several astronauts (my former sister-in-law was one), I can tell you that some of the brightest people in the country work in the space program--and I'm not just talking about the ones that get to go into space.

Add to that the fact that I grew up during the era of the space race, when the Cold War mentality meant we had to beat the pesky Russkies at all costs; and the fact that many astronauts have ties to our area, and I've been hooked all my life. One of the short list of people I'd like to meet before I die is Neil Armstrong. From Wapakoneta, Ohio, Mr. Armstrong was, as most people know, the first man on the moon. But recently new information has come to light about his famous quote.

Here, from the Sun of London, is an interesting story about Neil's famous line--and other misheard, and unheard lines from history, too. Enjoy.

NEIL ARMSTRONG’S famous quote “That’s one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind” has become one of the best- known in history.
For nearly four decades, it was claimed the first man on the moon FLUFFED his lines — because man and mankind mean the same thing.
Armstrong was supposed to say: “That’s one small step for a man . . .” But yesterday the space pioneer was cleared — thanks to new analysis of the historic 1969 recording.
The findings show there is an acoustic wave where the “a” was meant to be — and it was simply not audible over the broadcast static.
Here, GRANT ROLLINGS looks back at some of the other famous phrases misquoted over the centuries.

“Not a lot of people know that” — Michael Caine. The actor never uttered that well-used catchphrase. The actual quote in the film Alfie was “Not many people know this.”

“Elementary, my dear Watson” — Sherlock Holmes. Author Arthur Conan Doyle never wrote these words for his pipe-smoking detective. The quote actually appeared in a film review in the New York Times in 1929.

“Beam me up, Scotty” — Captain Kirk. The closest Star Trek’s captain came to using this phrase was “Beam us up, Mr Scott.”

“Play it again, Sam” — Humphrey Bogart. In 1942 movie Casablanca, Bogart in fact says “If she can stand it, I can. Play it!” while actress Ingrid Bergman says “Play it, Sam. Play As Time Goes By.”

“Let them eat cake” — Marie Antoinette. She actually said: “Let them eat bread.”

“Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned” — William Congreve. This is a shortened version of the playwright’s: “Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned, nor hell a fury like a woman scorned.”

“You dirty rat” — James Cagney. Anyone impersonating the Hollywood legend uses this phrase, even though it was never uttered by Cagney in any movie.

“Alas, poor Yorick, I knew him well.” — Hamlet. William Shakespeare’s line actually reads: “Alas poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy.”

“Kiss me, Hardy” — Horatio Nelson. Popular legend says the naval hero uttered these final words to the captain of HMS Victory, Thomas Hardy, after receiving a fatal wound during the
Battle of Trafalgar. But some historians argue Nelson in fact said: “Kismet, Hardy.” Kismet is “fate” in Turkish.

“Me Tarzan, you Jane” — Tarzan. This phrase does not appear in any Tarzan film, nor in the book by Edgar Rice Burroughs.

“Spare the rod, spoil the child” — The Bible. The correct quote from Proverbs 13:24 is: “He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.”

“Religion is the opiate of the masses” — Karl Marx. The communist philosopher’s full quote was: “Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world and the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opium of the people.”

“Do you feel lucky, punk?” — Clint Eastwood. As Harry Callahan in Dirty Harry. Clint’s full line was: “I know what you’re thinking, punk. You’re thinking, ‘Did he fire six shots or only five?’ . . . But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you’ve got to ask yourself a question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?”